you

You give me hope,
The strength, the will to keep on;
No one else can make me feel this way
And only you
Can bring out all the best I can do;
I believe you turn the tide
And make me feel real good inside.

You pushed me up
When I'm about to give up;
You're on my side when no one seems to listen
And if you go,
You know the tears can't help but show
You'll break this heart and tear it apart;
Then suddenly the madness starts

It's your smile,
Your face, your lips that I miss,
Those sweet little eyes that stare at me
And make me say,
I'm with you through all the way.

'Cause it's you
Who fills the emptiness in me;
It changes ev'rything, you see,
When I know I've got you with me

*Song by Basil Valdez - you

bout someone in the past..

haloo halooo.. lama tidak berblogging.. just went back from a great holiday *or should i call it honeymoon? :P * with Nia to germany.. we went to bremen, hamburg and berlin.. asik banget lah.. jalan2 ampe gempor, sepatu jebol, kaos kaki basah, gotong2 tas yang segede2 gaban dengan duit yang makin lama makin menipis..heheh.. tapi seruuu!! ya ga nia? :D

btw, pengen crita.. tapi sori kalo cerita gw ini tampak sangat kental unsur opini pribadinya.. namanya juga blog gw, terserah lah gw mo ngasi opini apa.. tp insya Allah opini nya ga nge-offense siapa2, kalaupun iya, nama dan kejadian tidak disebutkan *halah siga naon wae* jadi begini, ada seorang cowo.. he was my senior in high school.. i've dated this guy... ga lama sih.. *buat yang jealous, dont be! i didnt even fall for him* tapi kita ngedate tuh dah lama banget.. jaman2 gw kuliah tingkat 1 apa tingkat 2 gitu deh.. but then we realized kalo kita tuh sama2 ga cocok.. tapi komunikasi mah ga putus dari situ, tetep berjalan ampe gw punya cowo lagi dan dia punya cewe.. gw putus ama cowo gw dan dia masih tetep ama cewe nya..dan gw punya cowo lagi dan dia tunangan.. dan ampe dia nikah baru2 ini.. jealous? no i am not.. karena gw juga tau gw ama dia wont be good together.. it was the first reason why we didnt commit into relationship.. the fact that he's getting married not really making me jealous, tapi ada perasaan gmana yah? yaaa.. gitu lah.. ga sedih, bukan kecewa apalagi cemburu.. it's just a thought that i cant deny that he's a great guy.. he's almost everything that a girl wants..but again, i didnt fall for him.. and i dont..

dan tadi gw ngeliat foto2 nya dia n istrinya.. dan gw kaget banget.. krn di foto itu istrinya berpenampilan beda banget ama yg biasanya.. i wont tell what she do.. tapi bnr2 gw ga nyangka si cowo ini bakal ngebiarin istrinya ky gt.. yaa bukan apa2 sih.. tampak drastis aja, soalnya mereka baru nikah gt.. oh please God! i marry someday, i dont want my husband to just let me do that kind of thing.. yah mungkin tiap orang beda2 pemikiran kali.. tapi buat gw, gw pengen punya figure suami itu harus bisa ngemong, ngebimbing dan mengarahkan gw ke arah yang bener.. ke arah yang lebih baik.. lebih mendekatkan diri ke Allah.. mgkn dia khilaf aja *smoga begitu!!* and why i put the blame on him rather than her, karena yaa..dah jelas2 cewenya salah gt, tapi kok cowonya ga ngasi tau atau ngingetin..dan another reason is, gw mah ga peduli ama cewenya, tapi gw bener2 jd sadar, it was right thing that i let him go..

dan somehow gw ngerasa bersyukur sama Allah.. ternyata walaupun gw ngeliat "he's a great guy" tapi mgkn dia bukan figure yg gw inginkan.. bener ternyata perkataan " apa yang baik di mata kamu belum tentu baik di mata Allah dan apa yang buruk di mata kamu belum tentu buruk dimata Allah" gw cuma berdoa semoga gw dikasi yang terbaik sama Allah.. dibimbing di setiap jalan yg gw tempuh.. i pray so that i can get what i need, not only what i want.. and most importantly, bisa selalu dekat sama Allah.. amin ya Allah.. well.. that's just my opinion.. if u wanna put any comments or opinion, u r welcome to do so.. :D

how i wish..

how i wish him to know that i miss him so much..
how i wish him to know that i miss it when i can say "aku sayang kamu" anytime i like..
how i wish him to know that i miss all the stupid jokes and silly things we did together..
how i wish him to know that i miss it when he sing songs with his guitar for me before i sleep..
how i wish him to know that i miss stay up until morning so that i can say good night to him..
how i wish him to know that i miss his calls in the middle of the night or early morning that disturb my sleeps..
how i wish him to know that i miss looking deep into his eyes..
how i wish him to know that i really wanna go back to all the memories that we had..
how i wish him to know that i'd give the world to him..
how i wish him to know that i care about him so much..
how i wish him to know that i've been dreaming bout him so many nights..
how i wish him to know that i'm crying while writing this..

but.. when i am the one who became the victims of all this feeling.. what should i do? would he do the same? would he give the world to me? would he change for me..?or should i just live in this wishful world?

Tidur..

Tidur.. kynya akhir2 ini gw sukaa banget tidur, well, who doesnt.. right? ini gara2 selaen cuaca yang mendukung dan ditambah sekarang mo masuk winter, which makes the day is only 8 hours and night is 16 hours.. jadi aja waktu tidur nya makin panjang.. sebenernya jam tidur malam sih ga ngaruh, tapi kadang2 siang yang cuma 8 jam itu pun suka dipake tidur juga..
sebenernya gw tidur bukan karena gw ngantuk.. well yea, it's another reason, but the main reason is because i feel less tension when i'm sleeping..it's like i could escape from stress i have for a while.. of course i do.. bcoz the brain will stop doin its acivity while we're sleeping.. and in my sleep i could have my own dream.. exactly the way how i want the reality to be.. i should face the reality again when i wake up though.. which like put the big stones on my head.. but having a good sleep and forget bout the world for a while really helpful..Hopefully one day i will have the reality as what i had in my dream.. the way i want it to be.. Amin..